I used to be so insecure.
I literally wanted to look like someone else. I’d look at other women and think, wow she’s pretty. If I only had hair like hers or a body like hers, confidence like hers, clothes like hers… then, I would feel good about myself.
It was a constant breaking down of myself through comparison, and self-harm.
It took a long time for me to love me – to look in the mirror and compliment myself. And to then be able to compliment others.
Loving me, the way God made me, was something I had to do for me with God. So I meditated on – How does God see me? What does He love about me? If God created me with this face, this body, this hair, this personality, He did it on purpose. Who am I to criticize God’s work?
So, I prayed for confidence.
I learned to genuinely compliment others without comparing myself to them.
I worked on inside me and then the me on the outside started to change. I finally arrived at a place where what I thought of me carried more weight than what others thought of me.
I didn’t accomplish this in a year or two years, this was years of undoing, reshaping, and rebuilding.
I became new.
Here are some things that helped me, that may help you, become the new you while waiting:
- I asked God for help and continued to ask as I learned more about myself. I learned what needed to change on the inside before anything changed on the outside.
- Fasting has brought me so much clarity and deliverance while also drawing me closer to God. I’ve fasted for a number of reasons – family, friends, relationships, work, healing….anything really. And without fail God let’s me know He’s right there with me and gives me insight I didn’t have before.
- Tons of things can be gleaned from reflecting. Personal reflection through meditation, quiet time, reading or thinking can help you learn more about yourself.
- Once you realize there are areas of your life, your mind, your heart that need to change, change them!
I also read a lot of self help books. I’m admittedly a self- help junkie.
Here’s a list of some of the books I’ve read:
- A Jewel in his Crown, Discerning the Voice of God, and One in a Million by Priscilla Shirer
- Eat the Cookie, Buy the Shoes, Battlefield of the Mind, The Confident Woman Devotional, Do Yourself a Favor, Forgive, and Living Beyond Your Feelings by Joyce Meyer
- Everyday A Friday by Joel Osteen
- God Speaks Your Love Language, The Five Love Languages, Things I Wish I Knew Before I Got Married, and The Four Seasons of Marriage by Gary Chapman
I tend to chain-read when I’m going through but now that I am growing through I try to find encouraging things to read.
To make any lasting changes you have to be locked-in and you have to be close to God. Start lining up your thoughts about you with what God thinks about you. Decide to be and become the BEST you, you can be! And when you come out on the other side you’ll look in the mirror and smile knowing that when God made you, He made a masterpiece!