Reality

A picture is worth a thousand words but during this social media age, oftentimes pictures tell stories that aren’t true.

The picture above is me in July of 2012, faking it.

About 8 years ago I went on vacation with a friend. A week earlier I’d gone through a pretty tough break up. Because I didn’t see this coming and we’d spent a lot of time planing this trip, I didn’t tell her.

Being the rockstar friend that she is, she asked about my then boyfriend – while we were in line at the airport  – so I shared the details with her.

I tried to put on a brave face and have a good time, and for the most part I did, but there were intense moments of sadness that sent me into a tailspin.

Even with these moments of sadness I managed to post pictures that told a completely different story – one I wished was true. The picture above and some others from the trip were of me fighting back internal tears to project an “I’m ok” persona. 

All of the memories from this trip (thanks Facebook!) remind me that we have to be honest about what’s going on with us. It’s taken me a long time to answer, “How are you doing?” honestly and thoughtfully.

We tend to hide. We hide behind problems and smiles hoping no one notices the deep battle within.

Cancel that. Cancel the idea that you have to be ok all of the time. Cancel the thoughts that keep you from saying how you’re really doing and feeling.

I’m not saying to tell everyone what you’re feeling. Instead, pick and choose who you can share this side of you with. Pick and choose what you post and be careful not to filter your feelings because somehow, someway they’ll come to the surface.

And to be honest, and practice what I’m preaching, I’m struggling a bit today. I’ve cried enough tears to fill a shot glass. At the same time, I’m actively doing what I can to change my mood. This is real life. Everything isn’t good all the time. Good days and bad days abound. I’m working through mine.

With love,

TiffaniJane